Spoon man

Alejandro and I met during lunch yesterday to go over some of the paperwork for the house deal. The buyers will have to alter their expectations if they intend to own my house. The inspector discovered that my house is 30 years old, and some of the problems of an older home apply. I can't fix stuff. I have also been too poor for the past decade to hire someone to fix stuff. Hey- it happens. Houses age. Get over it.

Anyhow, as we were deciding where to go and eat lunch, we tried to think of places that had free WiFi.  He suggested BJs in Addison, so we met there at one. I sent him a text message at 12:56 saying I was early, and I had planned to get a table. He showed up, and we were seated by one. We had the worst waiter I have ever even heard of, let alone experienced. We ordered our food, and after that, we watched another table order, receive their meal, eat it and have their plates cleared away. That's when our food finally came- just not all at once. Alejandro's food came out first. It was a chicken dish. I had ordered the soup and salad. Soup is generally prepared in the morning- before the lunch rush- and salad is a bowl of freaking lettuce. It's not like I ordered the most complicated thing they serve. When the person who was running the food set down Alejandro's chicken, he looked as though he was about to turn and walk away. I stopped him and asked, "Did you happen to see a soup and salad when you were back there?"

Our waiter, Michael was the worst. showed up with my soup and salad after Alejandro had his chicken for a while.  I didn't manage to get a spoon right away.  As he set the bowl down, I asked for a spoon.  He said, "Oh, yeah." Then he went to go get one. When he returned he was carrying two pizzas. Even though he was serving food to another table, I stopped him and said, "A spoon?" He said, "Oh, yeah," as he walked away with the pizzas.

He came back after dropping off the food to explain to me why I didn't have a spoon. He said he had sent someone to go and get the spoon. I didn't care. I didn't want a conversation, I wanted a spoon. 

It does make you wonder, though, if he didn't get a spoon for me because he was not authorized to handle flatware. Maybe there is some special code to access the spoon drawer, And he does not yet have that access code. Hard to know. 

Anyhow, Michael ran back to the kitchen and emerged not too long after that with a spoon. It was kind of remarkable timing too, because Alejandro was finished with his meal. I was finished with my salad. I had only a bowl of soup to handle at this point.

I went ahead and ate some of the soup, but we had already been at that table for a very long time. Michael promised us a dessert. Something called a pizookie. 

The desert never materialized, and the check came out. We just wanted to pay and get back to work, since I had been gone from my campus for an hour and a half. The check had four food items listed on it and was for over $50. We had only ordered two food items, so the check was a bit puzzling. 

Alejandro brought this to Michael's attention, and then Michael went away, only to return with a corrected check some time later. He started to explain to us how he couldn't find a manager to help him erase the items that did not belong, so he split the check, putting our items on one and the wrong items on another.  I can't envision a world in which either of us could have cared.  Michael seemed to want to explain every misstep to us. The thing is, we really didn't have the time or the interest in any of the explanations.  We wanted food and beverage in a reasonable time frame, served with the appropriate tools and billed correctly at the close. 

Finally, when the corrected check was presented, Alejandro took a credit card and walked over to the terminal where he watched Michael run the card. Alejandro signed it, leaving no tip, and we left an hour after we set down. 

It's unlike either of us to leave no tip, but this was absolutely the worst dining experience in a restaurant I have ever had. It was pretty funny, to be honest, and it would have been a lot funnier if we weren't both trying to get back to work. Still, amusing me with your terrible service does not guarantee you a tip. It was pretty horrible. 

Anyhow, we got the paperwork signed, and we are still going back and forth with the buyers realtor. It's kind of a huge pain in the ass. I am headed out this morning to pick up dad and Danny so that we can redeem our Groupons that I bought for dad on Father's Day. 

Should be a good time. We have a tour to go on of the Firewheel Brewing Company in Rockwall. I need to hurry up and pick up the guys so we can make it there. Hopefully, I will not need a spoon.