Liquid Aloha

I'm spending my last few hours at Jeff and Kitty's house with them and with my nephews. Jeff and I are understandably a little exhausted from our mountainous morning. The unusual thing that happened this evening is that somehow, all three kids came upstairs and decided to voluntarily spend time in the presence of their parents and aunt. 

Jeff switched on Neil DeGrasse Tyson's reboot of Cosmos, and the boys explained to me that Dr. Tyson has a pretty spectacular mustache. They have very firm opinions about it, in fact. 

I'm having a few local beers. The Kona brewing company makes a pretty lovely ale. The outside of the bottle has an imprint of the Hawaiian islands on it, along with the words Liquid Aloha. 

In terms of utility, aloha is a pretty great word. I am about to leave, so aloha, everybody. 

Less fun than you'd think

This morning, Jeff took me to Koko Head so we could walk up the side. It was more of a climb for me and less of a walk. As it turns out, I really dislike climb-walking up the side of a mountain. 

I wore a pair of shoes I've had for several years, but today, I became acutely aware that the left one was just a tad too small. I was out of breath; I felt nauseous. In short, I found out I am not a climber. 

I went farther up the side of this thing that I imagined I would. I also determined that the only way I would make it to the top would be if an infant was trapped underneath a car up there, and I had to save the baby from certain death. Beyond that, I couldn't see a single reason in the world to get to the top. 

I have done so much stuff on this trip. Almost all of it was great. So I'm not a mountain climber. Anyhow, here's what Jeff looks like when he's very far ahead of you on a trail on the side of a mountain. 

Couch surfing

There is an actual business called Couchsurfing, but that's not exactly what I've been doing. My sleeping accommodations have been free and on the furniture of one of the people in the world that I trust the most. Whenever I visit Jeff (wherever the Army puts him), there's a pretty good chance I'll be waking up each morning on his living room furniture. 

I really appreciate the couch surfing this week, too. They have larger, fluffier couches than they had in previous visits, and I'm sure that a week of even inexpensive Oahu hotel accommodations would have sent me into a crazy amount of debt. 

I am all done on the couch, though. Tonight, I'll be on an airplane over the Pacific, and tomorrow night, I will be back on my wonderful, fancy mattress. It's been a truly amazing trip, and I'm grateful for the free place to lay my head, but I'm looking forward to being reminded why the TempurPedic mattress is so freaking expensive. 

Pineapple Express

On the way home from the North Shore, Jeff and I went to the Dole pineapple plantation. Earlier this week, we drove past and asked what people do when visiting the Dole plantation. The security man at the gate told us there is a giant pineapple maze.

Today, we navigated through the pineapple maze. It's a giant hedge maze with a pineapple shape in the middle. Throughout the maze, visitors are encouraged to locate stations listed on a map where they can mark their progress and learn facts.

After conquering the maze, we passed through the ubiquitous gift shop. It was out of control how expensive everything was in that shop. I know everything is pricier in Hawaii, but this shop was at a whole new level- especially when you consider the cost of the actual fruit and the shop's proximity to the pineapple fields. 

Dole

Don't go chasin' waterfalls

We're at Waimea Falls on he North Shore right now. I swam to the bottom of a waterfall and now have a hairstyle that matches this activity. I was seriously just under a waterfall. This was another thing I didn't know how much I wanted to do. Swim under a waterfall wasn't on the bucket list, but if you're putting your own list together, I would recommend adding it.

It was especially sweet because all three of the boys went in and actually played. It makes me so happy when they remember to play and be kids. What a day so far. 

The most important meal of the day

Jeff was up early this morning making some very fancy coffee. We apparently had to get a bit of a caffeine boost before we went out to breakfast. There's a pancake house in Kaneohe that serves some marinated Portugese pork with its eggs. I told the waitress I was about to mispronounce vinha d'alhos, and she knew what I wanted to order before I was able to mangle the name of the dish too badly.

We drove back from the restaurant on a road where the ocean was just to the right. Hawaii is good at juxtaposition. On the right was a beach and some beautiful crystal blue water. There were lush green trees. It was a postcard. On the left was a work crew cutting branches back from power lines and a garbage truck making it's rounds. A postcard to the right; a practical bunch of city work on the left. Juxtaposition. 

Top down

This evening, Jeff took me for a top-down convertible ride around a pretty good chunk of Oahu. We went to the North Shore, then past Schofield Barracks where he works. We didn't stop in or anything, but I did have the opportunity to see his daily commute. He has the prettiest commute of any person I know. Unfortunately, I left my phone at his house, so for the purposes of this post, I guess folks are just going to have to take my word for it.

We have a whole day planned tomorrow at the North Shore and a waterfall I'm told is pretty cool. 

For the remainder of the evening, the plan is to sit out on the back porch and have a few cocktails by the light of some tiki torches. 

Headwear of the Asian people

This morning, Jeff and I had some time to kill while Alex and Kitty went to an orthodontist's appointment. We decided it would be best to go to the Macadamia nut farm and shop. That's all we set out to do when we left the house. 

After we finished up at the nuthouse, Jeff decided to keep driving to a place where folks go to look at a geographical feature called The Chinaman's Hat. The name most likely predates the current practice of calling things by politically correct names. 

After we stopped to take a look at the headwear of an Asian person, we went to a Bhuddist temple that's sitting within a cemetery right behind Jeff's house. Apparently, he could add the temple to the path of his morning run with no trouble at all. 

Honestly, we were just buying nuts and killing time, but we managed to see beautiful things. This does not happen in Dallas. 

Chinaman's hat

The temple behind Jeff's house

Pearl Harbor

Jeff took me to Pearl Harbor today. I saw the USS Arizona once when I was 17, but seeing things at 17 and seeing them again when you are 39 will give you a totally different idea of what you're looking at.

It was genuinely interesting and the harbor was beautiful. It's a strange contrast. There we were, standing in a memorial over the top of a sunken battleship where many sailors were entombed, but we could see into the clear water where schools of fish swam over the sunken ship. A look around showed trees and calm water and beautiful scenery. 

There is a boat that the Navy runs out to the memorial and back. Here's a photo of Jeff and I on the way to see the memorial:

Here's Jeff looking all touristy

Rice paddy

While waiting for our opportunity to board a boat and go see the USS Arizona, Jeff and I had lunch. We went to a place in the Pearl Harbor area where we could see rice being grown and harvested out in a field. It totally amused me that the rice paddy was right next to a mall. Jeff was showing me that there was a very thin geographical separation between the government subsidized housing and rice paddies and the very expensive homes on the other side of the mall. 

I was very interested in the rice. Land is finite here. The volcanoes made Oahu only so big, so devoting square footage to rice farming really makes me think these folks place a premium on rice as a staple. 

Jeff is busy on the phone at the moment, and we're almost up for our boat ride to the Arizona. In the meantime, enjoy a view of a Hawaiian rice paddy. 

Holy crap- I can surf!

I surfed. I was apparently quite good at surfing. My instructor said I was good, and I actually believed him. I was able to get up on the board and ride it in quite a way.

Jack and I took a surf lesson together, and I managed to look more or less like I knew what I was doing. It was truly a good time. Our instructor was a guy named Jason who was blond wth a deep bronze tan. I paddled out and surfed in a few times. The lesson was an hour long, but I packed it in a few minutes early because my arms were tired of paddling. 

It was pretty great- I was successful right away, and I was so surprised that I did it all correctly. 

After we wrapped it all up, we were all pretty hungry. I suggested that we go to Mike's Huli Huli chicken and get some carry out food. It was wonderful chicken, amazing Kalua pork and awesome macaroni salad. Mike's is a permanently parked collection of food trucks on the side of the road. Looks strange, but everything tastes great. 

I have no idea what we're up to tomorrow. We may go to the North Shore or to Pearl Harbor. I'm happy either way. Here are some awesome surf photos in the meantime, though. 

Doing pretty well

Surprised at how well I'm doing 

Mike's Huli Huli chicken

Insert Beach Boys lyrics here

Jeff has looked over the surf report- he has a phone application that tells optimum times and proper information about the waves- and he has determined that today is the day to surf. We're at Waikiki beach now. I'm just waiting for him to return from parking his car so we can get moving.

Even waiting for someone to park is pretty here. I had Kitty take my photo in front of a biggol' banyan tree while I am babysitting all the surf things Jeff unloaded before venturing off to park. 

He should be along any moment; then the real challenge will begin. Surf's up. (I think...) 

iSnorkel

Today, Jeff took me to Hanauma Bay. We went there to snorkel. I have never done any snorkeling before. It was not even something I had really thought about doing, but it was pretty cool.

I was worried that my lack of skill as a swimmer would thwart me in my snorkeling, but it turns out that I am pretty buoyant. Apparently, most people are buoyant in the ocean. Salt water. Go figure. 

It was way more fun than I anticipated. I came here wanting to try surfing, then anything else would be a bonus. This was most certainly a bonus. Having never snorkeled before, I didn't have any idea how cool it really is to see all of the fish up close. Naturally, I forgot most of their names, but I remember the colors. Some were bright and patterned while others were more camouflaged in the environment. I did manage to see the official state fish. It's called the Humuhumunukunukuapuaa. Yeah- I had to look that one up...

Amazing times- That's about all I had to say about this one. It was just great. We didn't take any cameras down to the beach, but this is the bay as seen from the parking lot: 

'Round back

I'm still not entirely successful at being awake and asleep during the correct times of day. It's 6am here, but I know deep down that it's really 11am at my house. No matter, though. I decided to sit in Jeff's backyard a while.

When you're sitting in Jeff's backyard, everything around you is green. You hear so many different bird songs that you think they're being piped in somehow. Just over the treetops, you see the mountains that separate this side of the island from the other. It puts all lesser backyards to shame. I think I'll be out here every time I find myself awake while the rest of them sleep. 

Run, Forrest

It's hard for me to imagine that anyone hasn't seen Forrest Gump. That film is (to me, at least) a part of the American conversation. Everyone's seen it, right?

Alex and Andrew are 15; Jack is 12. Since the movie Forrest Gump is 20 years old, I suppose it's entirely possible they hadn't seen it. Hard to fathom. 

Jeff and Kitty summoned the kids upstairs to watch the movie, and they liked it. I doubt the twins had any intention of enjoying the movie, but they did. 

I had to stop myself from turning the whole thing into a sing-a-long. I have been guilty in the past of saying the same thing as Tom Hanks at the same time he says it. Might have ruined the whole thing for the boys. 

From here to eternity

We went to a beach today- evidently, it was the same beach that was in From Here to Eternity. It was beautiful. Jeff, Kitty, Jack and I were there splashing around in the waves.

We were going to snorkel, but Jeff accidentally injured Kitty by crashing his head into her leg in the water. Her post-collision limp wasn't conducive to further strain. We're taking a lunch break now. I am waiting on some chicken and something called an "orange bang" to drink. 

Who knows what we have on the schedule for the rest of the day- havin a great time so far, though! 

Waterfall hunting

Jeff likes to go "waterfall hunting." I asked if we shoot the waterfall once we find it, and I asked about the possibility of going to a taxidermist and getting my waterfall mounted for display. It was not that kind of hunt.

We had to cut our hunt a little short, though. I am apparently irresistable to all manner of insects. When we got back to the car from the walkabout, I looked practically polka-dotted. On a positive note, whatever decided I was so delicious apparently has a short term effect on my legs rather than a long term one. I'm not completely speckled this morning. 

After the great hunt, we came back to wash up. We were extremely dirty. Once clean, we were joined by all three of my nephews for a trip into Honolulu for dinner. Because of the time difference, I was totally wiped out way before bedtime, but I did my very best to begin adjusting to the new daylight hours I'll be having this week. Good thing, too. I'm told I'll snorkel today. Fingers crossed. 

A soda comes with a flower. So does a beer. 

Hunting. 

Jeff- my hunting guide.

Window seat

It's just about two hours away from the time my flight is scheduled to land at Honolulu Airport, and I will be very glad to part ways with my temporary traveling companions.

When I got on the second flight, I was supposed to be in seat 16F. I walked up to row 16 to find a woman in my chair. She and her (late teens?) son were seated at the aisle and window, and they seemed to think I would be fine taking the middle seat. Let me ask you this- would you?

Nobody likes the middle, and it would be damned weird to sit between a mother and her son. I bought this ticket in March. I chose the window because I like the window. I like to look out the window. About 10 minutes after we were situated, the young man informed me I could close the window if I like. I tried to be polite and close it. Another ten minutes passed, and mom told me to open the window. Whatever. Then about 20 minutes later, she reached over my lap to close the window. 

If it's that important to have control over the windows, here's an idea- buy your freaking ticket in March. 

I'm watching the movie now. It's the second Captain America film. When it's over, I plan to unapologetically open my window. 

One leg at a time

One flight down, one to go. I am getting to Honolulu like I put on my pants- one leg at a time. I had the distinct pleasure of sitting next to someone with extremely wide shoulders and no consideration for the personal space needs of other people on the way from Dallas to Phoenix.

I hope I have a much smaller and much more self-aware neighbor on this flight, since it's three times as long as the one I just finished. 

Granted, this is a pretty first-world problem. I'll look around here at gate A6 for a while and try to decide who would be a good seat-neighbor until it's time to board, then we're all off on a plane to try to land on a small dot of land in the middle of a very large ocean. 

Leavin' on a jet plane

Quite like a little kid on Christmas Eve anticipating Santa, I didn't sleep as soundly last night as I should have. I was too excited.

Even now, I'm nearly a full hour early for the first leg of my journey, having breezed through check in and security with deft speed. I suppose we'll start boarding in about a half hour, and I do have a book to entertain myself until then. From the looks of the Starbucks in this terminal, I could probably manage to spend about 30 minutes in line for a cup of coffee. 

No matter, though. Because of the way I'm moving through time zones, I'll be leaving DFW just after 6am and arriving in Honolulu before noon. Seems implausible- but the return trip will fly overnight. Oh, time zones! 

A major shout out to Cas for the 4am-ish airport ride that he insisted was his pleasure. I get that he likes me, but since when is a trip to the airport a pleasure. He must really think I'm cute or something. ;-)

Anyhow, I am ready to go. Hawaii, here I come! 

In trivia, three's not a crowd at all

Last trivia night for a while, I'm afraid.  I will be in Hawaii when the next one rolls around, and Cas will be with me in San Antonio the week after that.  Our next opportunity to kick that much ass in that little space will be three weeks from now.  We're pretty much obligated to go, too, since we won the $25 prize redeemable at that very bar.  You see- that's how they get 'cha. 

Cas named our team tonight.  We were "Inappropriate Topical Reference."  That name is so him.  An analytical fella would find a trend in clever trivia team names.  He would notice that they were usually topical, generally funny and typically mildly inappropriate.  It was fine with me and with Jerone.  Laura was supposed to come, but her new sweetheart was sick, and she decided to take him to the hospital rather than hang out with nerd friends at a bar answering questions.  Probably for the best.  We were able to manage the Kardashian question without her, but we did miss a point on a Black Eyed Peas song title, and I think she would have had that one.  She is our pop culture person.  It's pretty remarkable that the three of us were able to do what we did, though.  We've been on teams of six that didn't do as well.  

After the game was all finished, an intoxicated member of another team came by to size us up.  She said she was very competitive and had come there intending to win.  See, that's all wrong.  You go there intending to have a good time.  If you do well, then more power to you.  It's good to be confident, I guess, but you don't get to be disappointed in a non-first-place result so much that you want to confront the nerds who did accomplish first place.  The thing is, I think this lady was on a fourth or fifth place team.  There were other teams who came in between her and her ultimate goal.  No matter, though.  She must certainly have a whopper of a hangover by now.  She is welcome to come back next week when Cas and I (and very probably, our team) will be gone, but I have doubts about her future success. 

Today, though, I have to pack the rest of my bag (Of course I already started.  Duh.  Planner...) and get myself ready for a week on the beautiful island of Oahu.  I can't wait.  I am so excited to see my big brother and his family, and I am pretty jazzed about getting out into the ocean.  I only really dipped my toes in last summer.  This time, I am coming there with two swimsuits, some board shorts, a rash guard shirt and a mission to do lots of stuff.  I just hope I can recover from my zip-lining bruises and sore muscles before I try to balance on a surfboard. 

Bruised not broken

I am totally exhausted and pretty banged up.  There is an impressive bruise under my left arm and a nice matched set forming up on the tops of my thighs, and I wouldn't change a thing.  Today, Cas and I went on another pretty amazing date.  I had some tickets for the Trinity Forest Adventure Park.  It is way south of Dallas in the trees near the river, and they have zip line courses with wobbly obstacles required to get to the zippy parts.  There are rope bridges, swinging tire pathways and all sorts of odd challenges you must accomplish before you are rewarded with a zippy fun time. 

Naturally, there is a series of safety accessories.  We both had on an elaborate harness, some fingerless pleather gloves and a goofy blue helmet.  As we are wont to do, we went on a Monday.  It was pretty underpopulated. 

We had a great time.  We zipped and zoomed through the trees and had crazy fun, but there was a moment when I had to climb a wobbly ladder of wooden rungs hanging too far apart from cables.  It was the hardest thing I have had to do in quite some time, and I now know that I truly have the upper body strength of a 39 year old woman who does not work out with any frequency.  I clung to parts of that ladder for dear life.  I was completely winded when I got to the top, and I was pretty sure I was about to be sick.  All things considered, it was still pretty great. 

We have trivia tomorrow.  We have a pretty good team shaping up for that.  Cas and I both went home after the zippy time and showered.  We were totally filthy.  Cas came back later on with popcorn and fruit, and we watched a movie with a bottle of wine.  He is pretty great, and he's a heck of a zip-liner. 

I'd like to buy the world a Coke

Yesterday, I spent a little time in the afternoon shopping. I believe I have made myself clear about my preferences when it comes to shopping, but this trip involved a bathing suit, and that's one of those things a lady just needs to try on. That's usually followed by some frustration and self-loathing. Swimsuits are cruel. 

I did find a nice one with very little of the typical abject horror and overwhelming sadness that usually accompanies this shopping goal. Good thing, too. I tried a week ago and left the store with nothing but a strong desire for brown liquor. 

At the register, I saw a soda display next to the counter. There were Coke products, and their new marketing campaign invites consumers to share the beverage with someone. This one said I should share it with Jeff. I sent him a picture and offered to share a Diet Coke with him in about a week when I'm in. Hawaii. He said it sounded good. 

Photos and other bidness

Cas showed me his Ireland pictures last night.  There was photo after photo of beautiful, green landscape.  He had some grazing animals.  There were old churches, burial sites and plenty of pubs.  It was pretty much what you'd expect, and it looked like he had a great time.  A few of the photos looked like someone had taken them into Photoshop and manipulated them to bring up the levels of green.  

We stopped in the middle of the photos for dinner- that's how many he had.  I suggested that we go somewhere very Texan.  Whenever the Army puts my older brother far from Texas, he requires a great amount of Tex-Mex upon his return to the state.  I mentioned that as an option.  I also mentioned barbecue.  While Cas said the food in Ireland was very good, he seemed pretty pleased to have a nice plate of Texas barbecue.   

He told me that one of the ways he knew he was back on American soil was that a person on a television news channel said something about Kim Kardashian.  Ugh.  I figured another way to know for sure that you are in the US is this sign from the BBQ place that employed some rather creative spelling. 

I'm so fancy

After the successful dress-buying endeavor yesterday, Laurie and I discussed her "something blue" on the way back from the bridal shop. The wedding is just about a year away, but there's a particular garter thingy that her mother wants to give her, and it has some blue in it.

Something old, something new, something borrowed and something blue. That's the deal. I had an idea for something that would be both borrowed and old. I have a double strand of pearls I never wear. My great uncle Emmett brought the necklace home from Japan after World War II. He gave them to his mother, who later became my mom's grandma. It may be the oldest and fanciest thing I possess. Sometimes, it pays to be the only girl of an only girl. 

The pearls are a bit yellow, and I was wondering if they would look good with the white dress Laurie selected. Because I am not the standard-issue chick, I would have been fine either way. 

It turns out that the pearls are too dark. No sweat. I'm not super-touchy about stuff like that, but I did want to at least offer. I had something sufficiently old, and I wanted it back after the wedding. Old? Check. Borrowed? Check. I had half of the requirements met. 

Dan and Laurie have a year to get the details all worked out. I'm sure Laurie has all the bases covered already- she's a planner, too. But I put on my really old pearls today. I'm so fancy. 

Playing dress up

Today, I went with my future sister-in-law to a bridal shop.  It's my understanding that most women like this sort of thing- going shopping for dresses with other women.  I am clearly not most women.  I like Laurie.  I am happy she is marrying Danny.  I thought the bridesmaid dress was pretty.  I was pleased to try it on and make the purchase, in fact, but the prospect of shopping or doing wedding things is not as appealing to me as I am led to believe it should be. 

I don't go to malls.  I haven't really enjoyed them since high school.  I actually managed a good ten years of total mall avoidance until a boyfriend took me to a theater inside of a mall for a movie.  I still did no shopping while there.  If I could fulfill all of my clothing needs online, I would be fine with that, but there are just some things a lady needs to try on first. 

As for the bridal shop, it is just not my kind of place.  I looked at some of the frilly, fancy white dresses in passing, and I thought of what an absolute nightmare it would be to have to select one.  I have said for years that I would prefer to be a bride in blue jeans.  Nobody has tested that theory, and I am already steaming fast toward my forties, so there's a good chance we may not ever discover if I would be a blue jean bride or if I would cave in and wear a white dress.  No matter, though.  I am not particularly worried about the whole thing. 

I have watched some of my friends over the years make some bad decisions about marriage and children based (in part) on some misguided notion of proper timing.  Must marry before 30.  Must have children before 35.  Can't be single after a certain date on the calendar, so dance with the one who brung you. 

I think Danny and Laurie are motivated by the right things.  They want a life together, and they are a great couple.  She fits into the family very well.  She is good to him and good for him.  I had a fiancée in my twenties, and it wasn't like that.  When I left, it turned out to be one of the better decisions I have made.  I turned 30 as a single woman, and I will turn 40 with a bare ring finger and no regrets. 

As for today, I bought a very nice red dress that I may actually wear again after the last grain of rice is swept away and the happy couple is on their honeymoon.  I don't even care what she asks me to wear or how she may wish for me to style my hair, I am just glad that Laurie is so happy with Dan and he with her.  I'll wear whatever she wants me to if she keeps making my brother happy.  

Big boy potty

I have made an effort to write every day this summer, and when I got up this morning, there was a space in the back of my mind that wondered if I would have anything worthy to tell when the day drew to a close.  My father has been feeling sick, and I had a plan to check on him this morning.  If he was unable to eat or drink without further difficulty, I planned to take him to a hospital.  This isn't the stuff of a great story.  It's just kind of a bummer. 

When I got to my parents' house this morning after Dallas traffic tacked 15 minutes onto my usual trip there, I was ready to enforce my ultimatum.  Dad had to drink some water and try to eat something, or he was off to the hospital.  He rose to the occasion- if only slightly.  It was water and a graham cracker, but it was progress.  Late in the morning, he decided to fill a prescription to see if he could improve his results.  I volunteered to go to the pharmacy and pick up the medicine.  As I drove through the parking lot with the medicine and a few groceries, I saw something that I didn't have the heart to photograph.  I can only describe it. 

There was an SUV with the back popped open while a young, blonde soccer mom talked on a cell phone and paced behind the vehicle.  She was vaguely elegant in her motions, walking in a path behind the bumper of the vehicle, then returning the other direction.  Her dress was long but casual.  Her hair was shiny and well maintained.  Inside of the back of the vehicle, there was a plastic potty training seat facing outward, and on that training throne, a young blond boy was seated with his pants around his ankles.  He was using the potty training seat.  In the back of a vehicle.  With the hatchback open. 

I'm gonna go ahead and let that sink in.

Young toilet-user-in-training was looking at the parking lot from a wide-open hatchback while attempting to use the potty to...  umm...  potty. 

So many questions.

But these are the best ones my family and I were able to conjure after much discussion and great contemplation:

• Will this young man associate the vehicle with the activity?  Will all cars, trucks and SUVs become fair game?
• What happens with the contents of the "seat" when he finishes?  Does mommy drive around with a plastic chair full of waste?
• Was the bathroom at the store so very frightening that this was the best option?

That was the very most entertaining thing I saw today.  In other news, Dad is eating food again and starting on the road to recovery.  The count for the day when I left was a whole lot of water, a banana, an apple and two graham crackers.  He would have been a lousy traveling companion in his current state, but I am confident that he is well on his way to fine again. 

So as not to neglect my mother, my brother and my future sister-in-law, I made some cocktails while I was at the house.  I couldn't focus all of my energies on Dad.  It's not fair. 

I'll head back tomorrow, but later in the day, now that I know Dad is able to manage food again.  I'll probably spend the morning at my house, appreciating my big-girl potty and keeping the trunk of my own car closed.  

A simple "no" would have sufficed

As it turns out, everything isn't always about me.

I was scheduled to leave very early tomorrow morning for the airport for the first of my three summer trips: Boston with my dad.  He is fighting a nasty stomach bug today, and the flights were cancelled this afternoon.  If he didn't want to go, he could have just said so.  This illness seems a rather severe way to say no.

I have plans to go to over to my folks' house tomorrow morning and personally deliver him to a hospital if he can't keep something down.  Certainly, he is dehydrated by now.  This situation is disappointing, but I am more worried about my dad than frustrated about my travel plans.  There are thousands of cities I would like to visit, but I have just one father.

Boston was supposed to be my present.  I was going there on my parents' dime as a gift for my birthday.  My flight has been moved to Labor Day weekend, and I hope I can still talk the old fella into the journey.  I have gone on trips with my mom and my little brother.  I am going to see my big brother in a few weeks.  I don't get out and see the world with my dad.  He tends to go on motorcycle camping trips, and while I love riding my motorcycle, I don't think it's well suited for distance travel.  I also wouldn't really dig camping.  He sleeps on the ground in his sleeping bag inside of a tent.  When I see the world, I need a shower and a place to plug in my hair dryer.  I have first-world expectations, and I am pretty spoiled by my fancy mattress.

So, that's it for now.  I have the post office holding my mail for several days (for no reason, as it turns out), and plans to go check on my father in the morning.  My family sure knows how to have a good time, right?

Dave's not here, man

I honestly can't remember how long it's been since I had my last roommate. I want to say it has been about eight years. That could be correct. Since she moved out, she bought her own place across town, then left Texas entirely. She lives in Holywood now and works as an extra on some popular television shows. It seems to make her happy. You couldn't pay me enough to do what she did, though. I would hate to leave my home, quit my job and cross my fingers like that.

I still have these reminders that someone else used to be here, though. Sometimes, a letter comes in the mail for her. Every six months or so, I get a spate of calls from bill collectors trying to locate my ex-roommate. I'm still not sure how they got their hands on my cellphone number. I tell every one of them that they have the wrong number to the wrong person in the wrong state. In short, "Dave's not here, man."

Today, I had a moment of mild panic walking up the sidewalk from the mailbox. It was already getting dark out when I checked the mail, but I could still make out that one of the envelopes was a jury summons. 

Crap. 

Until I came back through my door and saw it in the light. It wasn't my jury summons. I wonder how many years she has to live in California before they stop looking for my ex-roommate here? 

So, Lori- if you can see this- you've been called up for jury duty. Better book a flight. 

I should make a list of my lists

I have mentioned that I am a planner.  It's so very true.  I try to be prepared for almost anything.  When I pack a bag for a trip, I am methodical.  I think of toiletries from the top down- meaning I literally start at the top of my body (shampoo, conditioner) and work my way down (q-tips, then toothbrush/toothpaste, then deodorant).  Sounds neurotic, I suppose, but it works.  I check the weather in the place I am headed to see if I should pack for warm or cold.  I try to predict if I will need an umbrella. 

I also make a lot of lists.  I am working through a list of things I should accomplish by Sunday.  I may have to mow the grass again.  I have to wash up and pack all the things I intend to wear.  I need to tidy up the house a bit, and I need to write down the details about the bills I need to pay.  I get paid once a month, and this month, that day falls during some travel, so I need a list of the amounts I should electronically send on that day.  That's right, I have on my list that I should write a list.  That's so freaking me it almost isn't funny.  Okay, it's a little funny.

This is just a four day trip.  When I go later this month for over a week, I am sure the list-making will reach a fever pitch.  I will also probably need to walk through my house a few times before I go to make sure all the doors and windows are locked, the thermostat is turned up and the oven isn't on for some reason.  In fact, maybe I should make a list of things to check before I go.  

Snatch the pebble from my hand

Today was the last day of testing for the summer, and I should clear over $500 for my troubles. When we do this in the summertime, kids from three different high schools come to one location and complete these assessments. For efficiency, we have them register in a single spot on campus. At Hillcrest this week, we had them register in the school gym.

They come in, we get them identified and grouped properly, we seat them on bleachers, then we take them to the testing rooms in groups. 

This morning, we did this for the last time of the summer, and a rather large grasshopper was with the students on the bleachers. In my understanding of insects, nobody was in any direct danger, but that didn't stop this little guy from making a whole seating section of teenagers jump and run. 

I'm sure he was just there to remind those taking the biology test about the insect kingdom. He was probably trying to provide a last-minute study tip, and if I was him, I would have been offended by the screaming, jumping reception. 

I keeps it classy...

So, after a brief 4 1/2 hour sleep, I was up administering a science test today.  Good thing I didn't have to teach anything.  I am too old to function on half rations of sleep.  Susan and Crissy were talking last night of making Tuesday night trivia a regular feature during the school year.  This morning, my body reminded me that I am a bit older than they are.  I would be very challenged to do a good job if I was out having beers and answering questions on a weekday during the school year and I intended to follow that with any kind of meaningful instruction the next day. 

When I finished testing today's batch of folks, I came home and had a nap.  Now, I have determined that the best way to spend this evening is with a glass or two of wine.  I can't remember who told me this, but someone mentioned a year or two ago that Target's Archer Farms makes a very yummy wine.  I have tried this yummy wine, and it is as I was told.  The trick is, the wine comes in a box.  I am going to sit down and drink some boxed wine this evening, because I keeps it classy. 

I am starting to think of all the things I should be doing for the fall.  I need to get my plans in place for the new class I am teaching, and I need to get better with Wordpress so the school newspaper can seamlessly bump up its online presence.  In short, I have some actual work to do, but I believe this evening is a perfect time to sip on some surprisingly lovely boxed wine, switch on Netflix and press play. 

Ladies' night

Sometimes, it's good to be around your lady friends.  This evening, Susan, Laura and Crissy were with me at trivia, and we came in a quite respectable third place.  Carl was with us, as well, but I was pretty focused on the camaraderie with my ladies.  I was mostly just curious to see if we could hold our own without Cas.  We were okay, but we didn't hang on to our first place crown.  As it turns out, we are pretty clever, but my fella sure does help. 

I got an email from Cas today, in fact.  He is having a great time in Ireland.  I am glad that is the case.  He should be having a great time.  I plan to have a great time when I go on my trip next week.  Still, trivia was strange without Cas.  He has been my only consistent teammate thus far, and I really love playing with him. 

Our team tonight was named today in honor of the German World Cup defeat of Brazil.  Evidently, some spiritual person in Brazil put a voodoo curse or magic hex on the German team.  It clearly didn't work.  Germany spanked the Brazilians.  Our team was called Voodoo doesn't work on Germans.  We played a good game, and we all contributed some solid material to the effort.  I won't be there next week for the match, but I believe Susan and Crissy may go, and Laura may head out too- all without me and my guy.  I hope they do well.  It always pleases me when teachers demonstrate our superiority.  It kind of validates us.  We should know lots of stuff, right?

I have to be up in a few hours to administer more testing.  I gave the exit level TAKS math test this morning, and tomorrow is the exit level science test.  This is more of the same- students who have finished all other high school requirements, but are denied a diploma until they pass all of the assessments.  It's a little depressing, if you want to know the truth.  I genuinely hope the best for them.  I want them to pass the test and get the diploma, but I can't do a thing about it.  I can only be positive and pleasant during the test.  I can't go in and answer questions or give them clues- not that I would have been any help during a math test anyhow.  I looked at the calculators they were using today and it took me a pretty long time to switch one of them off.  Yeah- I don't remember using a calculator in math class back in the nineties.  They're ubiquitous now.  Sign of the times. 

Anyhow, here is a rather fuzzy photo of my team this evening.  Lee came in later on in the match, but she is our honorary teammate (and perhaps mascot).  Additionally we were awarded some beer glasses for our near victory.  Go, nerds!  

Old school

When you spend six and a half hours in another person's classroom, you start to get an idea about that individual. Testing usually puts me in a position to learn this way. Today, I gave the summer administration of the TAKS exit level test. This is the phased-out test, so everyone there with me today was trying to fulfill what is probably the last requirement for a high school diploma. It's the old-school test, and I administered it in a 76-year-old building. 

In addition to the old-school test inside of an actually old school, the classroom I used featured an old style overhead projector. I know very few people in my line of work who still use those. This teacher whose space I occupied today was probably one of the last holdouts. I don't know anyone working in a computer lab who chooses an overhead projector over an in-focus style data projector. Everything about this computer lab seemed backwards to me. The rows were too close together, the machines were dirty, and the teacher workstation was clearly used by a Luddite. I haven't seen an "Ask" toolbar on a browser in forever, and most people in labs have more than one browser installed. Internet Explorer- ugh. 

If I got myself placed into that classroom permanently, I'd think I was being punished. 

It was fine for today's purposes, though. I just needed ten machines to run ten tests. 

It's got to be supremely frustrating to these test takers, though. The session began at 10:30, and the last one was out the door at five. They all need this last piece of the diploma puzzle, and they tried their best. 

In keeping with the old-school theme, the oldest person in the room taking the test was actually completing the TAAS test. That was phased out starting in 2002. That woman taking a test for a high school diploma was 28 years old. She will be 29 in September. Man, I hope she gets it. 

I'm back tomorrow, probably giving people a math test that I would fail if I tried it this long after my last math class. Again, I hope they all get it. It's got to really stink taking the old-school test when you're too old for school. 

Ooh, La La (Madeline)

I spent a little time with my mamma today.  When I got to the house, she was drying her hair.  She spends a lot of time drying her hair.  Mom's hair is very thick, and she is careful to make sure it looks correct.  She isn't a vain person, but her hair has to look right.  It's her thing.  When I arrived, though, she was hungry. We played a round of the I don't know; what do you want? game, and we were about to settle in on some breakfast tacos or something when her whole expression changed and she said, "Ooh- La Madeline."

Yes.  La Madeline.

Off I went in search of eggs, sausage, potatoes and croissants.  I was also given the mission of bringing back something from their yummy bakery case.  Not a problem.  Mom always says yes to a chocolate croissant.  In fact, if I ever encounter a situation when I worry that maybe she isn't eating anything, I think I should remember about this fondness she has.  I'm pretty sure there's always an appetite for a chocolate croissant.

We didn't do a whole bunch of stuff today, but it was good to hang out with my mamma.  She got a day entirely free of other humans yesterday, and she was pretty happy for the quiet.  Of course, I had to come in and interrupt it this morning.  It's probably in my job description as the daughter.  Dad came back from his trip in the afternoon, and by the time I left (around five), Danny was well on his way home with his fiancée Laurie.  The house is populated again, and it's very likely that all of the chocolate croissants are gone.  It's okay, though- La Madeline will make more.

It puts the sunscreen on its skin

Today was a good one.  I went to Holly and Jason's house, and we lounged by the pool.  Holly made pitchers of fruity drinks, and Jason was manning the grill.  He has a pretty good method.  He stands over the grill until it's too hot to bear, then he jumps into the pool to cool off.  I showed up empty handed and hungry, and nobody seemed too upset.  

While I was there, Jeff called.  We talked politics for a bit, then we shifted to a conversation about what needs to happen when I go and visit him in a few weeks.  Apparently, we are hiking.  I was planning on packing only flip-flops for footwear, but it seems I may need something more substantial.  He does something he calls waterfall hunting.  I'm game.  

Kris was in the pool today, too, and she came along with her boyfriend Alejandro.  I was the only one there without a sweetheart present, but it was totally fine.  I just forget sometimes how draining it is to be in the sunshine for extended time periods.  I am totally beat, in spite of the SPF 100 waterproof sunscreen that I can still feel on my skin.  I just want to go to bed super-early tonight.  

There were drinks, of course, but I felt it was the best plan to add a bit of extra juice to mine.  I wanted to leave at a reasonable hour and drive safely.  Done and done- I was parked in my own garage before 9pm, and all I want to do is scrub off the sunscreen, then crawl under the sheets.  

It was a good afternoon and evening, all in all, and the pool was a nice place to spend all that time.  Tomorrow, I am headed over to hang out with Mom.  It's Sunday, after all, and that is my family day.  Since Dad and Danny are both out of town, that makes my Sunday family day a Mom-and-me arrangement.  Should be good, though.  I was over there yesterday after I deposited Cas at the airport, and we had some pizza delivered.  I talked to her today, and she said she enjoyed two cold slices for breakfast.  When she is left to her own devices, I think she eats like a college student.  

That's it for today, though.  Enough with the floating about and sipping on Mai Tais.  I'm beat.  

Unfortunately, that makes me Yoko

I bought a present on the way to take Cas to the airport today.  I stopped at Half Price Books and picked up a faux-leather covered journal.  I thought it would be good for him to write in a book of some kind to help him hang on to the memories and moments from his trip.  He is traveling with his dad.  I figured there will come a time when he will be very glad he wrote things down.  I guess I am just kind of a sentimental sap.  That's pretty much the same reason I started writing a blog again.  I wanted to document my own travels this summer.  I am also going on a trip with my dad soon, then one alone to see Jeff, and I kind of wanted it all down somewhere.  I didn't mean to actually start writing the day-to-day story of my dating life, but this whole endeavor so far has been nothing short of my own Ballad of John and Yoko.  I guess I would like that thought more if it didn't make me Yoko.  

But today should signal a shift for a little bit.  I have a week of actual work.  That means I will have to get out of bed and be somewhere acting like an adult by eight for five mornings in a row.  It may be a shock to the system.  After that, it's time to pack a bag.  

In fact, that is what Cas was finishing up when I arrived at his place today.  He certainly has his own method.  Everything he needed appeared to be laid out on his dining room table, then the game of suitcase Tetris began.  I pretty much sat on his couch and tried to remain very small.  I offered to either help or sit still and stay out of the way.  He diplomatically let me know that I should keep out of it.  When he got everything together, we weren't exactly on schedule.  The original plan had been to stop for lunch, but he decided it was best for him to make clearing airport security a priority.  Probably the better move.  I went and had lunch with mom, and he ate something at DFW.  

Several hours later, he let me know he was in Philadelphia, and everything seemed to be on schedule.  It was iffy for a bit; there's a tropical storm that put the whole itinerary up in the air, but it appears his flights were unaffected.  If everything went to plan, he is in the air this very minute.  I hope it's going well, and I hope he has a blast.  I also hope the airline reunites him with his oh-so-carefully packed bag when he arrives.  See you in two weeks, Cas; have a great time!

Why doesn't America knock?

Because freedom rings.

Sorry.  Really, I am, but that joke had to come out.  It's that time again- happy birthday, America. Last night, I joined Cas at the top of his apartment complex parking garage to watch Addison's Kaboom Town fireworks.  The city does an event in a park and sells tickets, but I had no interest in joining a huge crowd and paying for the privilege.  Apparently, I am not alone in this feeling.  Cas wasn't too pumped up about the crowds, and a lot of people had the same thought about the parking garage.  Ironically, there was quite a crowd.  Go figure.  It still wasn't a big crowd.  I made up some margaritas and we sat in lawn chairs watching the sky.  That was it for a while, I'm afraid.  I'm taking him to the airport today, and he will be off on his big adventure.  

I decided to pick up a week of work this summer proctoring tests for the school district.  They have a week of make up times for kids who didn't pass the state assessments, and that week just so happens to coincide with the time before my own travel begins, but during Cas' trip.  I will be all bored and boyfriend-less; I may as well make a few bucks.  

As for this weekend, though, I plan to hang out with my mamma.  Dad is on a motorcycle trip and Danny has gone to Arkansas with his fiancée Laurie to be with her family.  Mom has the house to herself, which means that she will be wanting to binge watch some goofy sci-fi show and order takeout food.  I can't judge.  If I cooked for people all the time, I would certainly want to goof off and have Chinese food brought to my doorstep.  

I need to get a move on, though,  Cas will be expecting me in a bit, and I have to take a shower.  I can't have his last image of me for two weeks be unwashed.  

Here is a sparkly from last night's sky in honor of America's birthday.  I wonder if this is similar to how my cake is gonna look this year with its 40 candles...  

Yo quiero snicker doodle

What do you do when you have a spectacular sweet-tooth attack, but you really don't want to leave your house? You dig through cookie recipes until you find one for which you possess all of the ingredients. I do not currently have chocolate chips, bakers chocolate or peanut butter. That knocks out several of my favorites.

Turns out, I had everything necessary to make snicker doodles. I've never actually had those before. I made 16 of them. I currently have 14 cookies. By tomorrow morning, I may be down to a dozen- and I should probably share. 

Cas probably wouldn't turn down a few cookies, though I'm not sure what we may have on the books for tomorrow, but I think we'll see each other- especially if he wants some snicker doodles. 

I blog about your blog!

Okay, now this is just getting silly.  Trivia night has come and gone again, and our team was triumphant.  Cas and I have been to the Addison Ice House for six consecutive weeks, and we have been on the first place team four times.  We came in third once, and our trivia debut was a respectable eighth place, given that the two of us had only one teammate, and she left early. 

In defiance of today's US World Cup soccer loss to the Belgian team, we dubbed ourselves Belgium never won a Super Bowl.  I swear, we spend more time coming up with team names than answering any actual questions in the match.  It was a good group again.  Jerone was home with his son this evening, but his friend Carl was there.  Lady-geniuses Susan and Laura were in attendance, and I was there with Cas, as has been our standard arrangement since we started down this road of recalling minutiae together.  The quiz-master brought one of our rival teams over to orchestrate some kind of faux-confrontation after the match was finished, but I wound up chatting with the team's token lady.  She is a teacher.  So is one of the other folks on the team.  Teachers.  Go figure. 

Quiz-master Brett was in rare form this evening.  I am pretty sure he had been celebrating (or mourning) the soccer match earlier in the day, and he was having a few pronunciation issues with some of the questions.  We're mostly teachers on my team, though, and we get that it's sometimes hard to read out loud to the whole class.  He writes a blog about the game each Wednesday, and he asked last week if I read his blog.  I said, "Yes, I blog about your blog."  That wasn't true- until now.  Just to keep me honest, here is a link: http://www.geekswhodrink.com/1047/  He's a pretty clever writer.  There, Brett- I blogged about your blog. 

Anyhow, I am beat.  I have to hit the hay so I can wake up and mow the grass again tomorrow.  It grew so fast.  I guess that's what happens when it rains like crazy for half of June.  Next week's trivia team will be Cas-free, as he will be in Ireland.  The week after that, I will be in Boston.  I am sure the Addison Ice House will carry on and the republic will still stand. 

I will have to steal a photo of our team later from Brett's blog.  The one we had taken was awash in blurs and refracted light.  But if you're interested in trying to analyze the inner workings of my brain, this is what it looks like when I keep score.  (and probably why I don't usually keep score...)

Next day update--
Okay, here is the photo I stole from Quiz-master Brett (thanks, Brett!):